One Night Stands
One night stands are easy. Drink enough to lose your inhibition. Find someone who’s lost theirs. And do it.
If you don’t think one night stands are easy, you’re probably thinking too much. Or putting too much effort into it. One night stands aren’t about thought or effort. They’re about mechanics and odds.
Get the mechanics right – a few canned phrases, a confident gaze, a carefree attitude – and go to work. If it doesn’t happen the first time, try again. And again. It’ll happen. The odds are in your favor.
But don’t expect anything more. The key to one night stands is simplicity. Just physical gratification. Nothing more.
Relationships
Relationships are hard. Drink enough to lose your inhibition. Find someone who’s lost theirs. And try to start a meaningful relationship. It’s probably not going to happen.
That’s because relationships are about more than a few canned phrases, a confident gaze, and a willingness to play the odds. They require one person. And another person. And the desire to explore, discover, and not be freaked out by the unexpected.
Because sometimes the unexpected is freaky. It hits you off guard. “When I got into this relationship,” you might say one day, “I never thought of you as a foot fetish type of person.”
Though some experiences won’t be welcome in even the best relationships, many others will be. Like the time the moose came out of nowhere and she beat it away with a stick after you hid behind a tree. Or the time he took you to that place – you know where – and you watched the sunset while debating the merits of civic justice, or garlic pizza, or Billy Joel’s latest album.
Grow together. Learn together. Make mistakes together. And create something that is special and unexpected and worthwhile and good. So good.
We risk the unknown for relationships because we know that when they work, there’s nothing better!
The Choice
Sorry. This blog post isn’t really about merits of one night stands and long-term relationships. It’s about a decision that I’m about to ask you to make.
Do you choose to be with the person with whom you can build a life? Or do you choose to be with the person with the shiny wrist watch? Do you choose to do the thing you’ve always wanted to do? Or do you choose whatever distraction comes before that thing?
It’s my belief, after observing thousands of people in the past few years, that almost all of us would prefer to be with the people and do the things that are most meaningful in our lives. Yet so often we aren’t with those people… and we don’t do those things.
The Invitation
Wilford and I decided, almost two years ago, that we’d try to use new technologies and philosophies to build a community in which people can bring everybody and everything that is meaningful to them closer.
We’ve now built the foundation for that community… and people can now start joining it. [This is not the Avanoo site you currently see on www.avanoo.com. That site was an application that tested a concept... this platform is an experience that brings the concept to life.]
Meditations on Meaning (this blog) has touched on different elements of Wilford and my vision in every post. If you’re still reading today, after having read previous posts, it’s likely that at least something I’ve written has resonated with you. And that’s why Wilford and I are inviting you to be one of the first members of Avanoo’s crazy new community.
The Warning
Our invitation comes with a warning: Your experience with Avanoo will only be worth it if you’re looking for a relationship… not a one night stand (metaphorically speaking, of course).
The site that you’ll go to lets you easily bring meaningful people and experiences closer to you. But it doesn’t have shiny wrist watches. And the most impressive functionality is still being built. And some stuff will probably be confusing. And other stuff might break or not work the way it’s supposed to.
But if you’re like Wilford and me, this is precisely why you’ll take us up on this invitation. Because you like journeys with people who are a little bit crazy. Because you want to create and collaborate with these types of people. Because you believe that you can still change the world.
Last Words
If you accept my invitation, just email me here. I’ll get back to you and tell you how to join in!
